come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
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