He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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