Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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