careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Randomize
