It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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