That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
Randomize