Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
