Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
