4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
In the 2nd smartest move of my day your ringtone for when you call is now the Space Jam theme.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Randomize
