You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
We are two peas in an std pod
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
