I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
That was when I yelled "Wisconsin powers activate!" and took off sprinting across the ice
I got to my internship late... with a bag of chipotle and sex hair.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Randomize
