i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
True life: I inadvertently fucked a whole friend group. More details to come tonight.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
