do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
