Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
dude i woke up to 20 missed calls from you, 3 from a blocked number and had 13 voicemails that all said "send me a picture of your tits."
so im guessing thats a no.....
there was a trapeze. enough said
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
My niece just called my sister in law a teabagger. I love NPR and it's corrupting influence on small children
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
