Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
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