Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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