i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Trouble in the neighborhood - turns out my brother's summer lawn care gig also entailed banging three different MILFs and they just all found out about each other
Gotta pay for college somehow...
Randomize