Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Randomize