How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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