don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
