I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize