What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
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