Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I got so pissed i stormed off and threw his burrito on his windshield
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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