It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
