i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I dropped her off at home and her fiancé was shitty, it was 4:30 am. I told him I was the Uber driver
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
