Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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