week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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