I accidentally burped into my bong.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
well we started off by chasing vodka with chocolate milk and ended up trying to befriend a crippled raccoon so that should tell you how our night went
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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