just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
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