You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
