Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
foreskin is a definite game changer
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Randomize
