: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
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