he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize
