Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize