I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I'm in the grocery store cradling a box of wine like it's my firstborn, so of course this would be the first and only time I've ever seen my boss outside of the office.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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