At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Randomize
