I can't watch pbs sober anymore
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
