I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He jumped into a mall fountain. I don't think that warrants a lifetime ban or the disorderly persons charge, but whatever. Fuck you Pennsylvania.
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
