That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
