Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
No subtext here. People are naked.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize
