Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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