I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Randomize
