the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize