You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Thank god i puked near the cancer center. makes me look like a chemo patient
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
This morning he fucked me while I was brushing my teeth. So I kept brushing as he thrusted. Then I brushed his teeth with my toothbrush while he was still in me. So hygienic.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
Randomize
