If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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