he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Randomize