So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I can't really text bc it's too expensive but I thought youd like to know I just shit myself in a gift shop.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
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