Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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