I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
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