I can't breathe out the right side of my face
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
Church boner. Awkwardddd
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
