I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
this hospital has no fireball
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
