I want to walk on stilts...naked
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Randomize