Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
Randomize
